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Askew Review 15

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THE BIG ONE-(Dog Eat Dog Films) Documentary. 90 min. PG-13. Starring, written, and directed by Michael Moore. Follow author/filmmaker Michael Moore on his book tour promoting his best seller “Down Size This.” Also, watch as Michael questions, or tries his best, the CEOs of large, union busting corporations who are laying off hundreds of workers and moving to Mexico even though the companies are already turning huge profits. Witness the lengths large book stores will go to keep their own employees away from Michael when he visits to discuss his book. The highlight of this film is when Michael unexpectedly shows up at the headquarters of Nike and is invited to talk with CEO Philip Knight concerning Nike’s policy of employing underage workers at foreign sweatshops. See Phil squirm.
    
Although I disagree with some of Michael’s beliefs, this film is very cool and informative. It will open your eyes to corporate America. It is very interesting, as well as laughable, how these companies respond to Michael’s questions. Michael’s first film, “Roger And Me,” follows Michael’s quest to talk with General Motors CEO Roger Smith about his decision to close the GM plant in Michael’s hometown of Flint, Michigan. “Roger And Me” is very disturbing as it depicts how an entire town is crippled by the closing of it’s largest employer. Both movies are a must see.

BLOWBACK: LOVE & DEATH (Central Park Media) 1990. Action. Approx. 90 min. NR, violence. Japanese with English subtitles.  After witnessing Yamaneko gun down his partner Baku in cold blood, Jo sets out to seek revenge for his dead friend. With a few bullets in him, Jo retreats to a bar in The Philippines that Baku once frequented in the hopes of finding some help. At the bar, sexy Rei nurses Jo back to health and offers to help Jo track down the men who killed Baku, for a price of course. On their first attempt to find Yamaneko, Jo and Rei find themselves knocking on death’s door, but are saved by a bounty hunter named Ratts. Ratts is also after Yamaneko, but for different reasons. Working as trio, they find one of Yamaneko’s henchmen and have a little skirmish with him. As a result, Yamaneko captures Rei and murders Ratts snitch. Using revenge, money, and love as motivation, Jo and Ratts do battle with Yamaneko and his gun-wielding madmen.
       Yikes, this is one poorly put together hard boiled action flic. First off, we have no idea why Joe and Baku are running from whoever they are running from. Although constantly running for his life and being shot at, Joe’s hair is always perfect and he is always wearing his cute little sports/dress jacket. The final scene has Joe surrounded by Yamaneko’s men, who are armed to the hilt, but he still finds a way to kill all 50 shooting men without getting shot himself. Ug, I hate that. Not to mention the obvious theft of the coffin and HUGE gun idea from Django. Oh, the melodrama between Joe and Rei is downright sickening. On a more humorous note, there is an English language newspaper viewed that Joe is reading, the headline misspells ‘Gangster” as “Gangter!” Too funny. Not sure if this is a language thing, but the characters always order people to “get on the car” or “get on the jeep” as opposed to “get IN the car,” etc. Although the video box lists the title as the above, the movie opening lists it as “Blowback 2” Not really sure which one is correct over here. Not all is lost here though. If you like guns you will like this flic. Lots of manly gun loading and cocking to wet your whistle. It is said that over 300,000 bullets were used while making this flic. NRA members will dig that fact like a trench. The gun shot wounds are pretty snazzy as well. There is also a pretty good twist dealing with Yamaneko’s top assassin Lopez.  However, that only last about three seconds. Lets put it this way, if this movie was made in the United States, it would star Micheal Dudikoff with Wings Hauser and would air on some second rate cable station. – Denis Sheehan

BOTTOM FEEDERS- ($20- Agitprop Film, 1598-C Broadview Ave, Columbus, OH 43212) Crime Thriller/drama. 93 min. NR, violence. Although knowing he is involved with a gang of simpletons and psychopaths, Plank McCall agrees to take part in the robbery of a high stakes poker game hosted by area thug Tony DiPaolo (John Saxon). Not only does the hold up fail miserably, but lives are lost and Plank accidentally leaves his wallet at the scene of the crime. Knowing he is screwed, Plank gets out of town and heads directly to the meeting spot where the rest of the group will meet in three days to divide up the money before heading there separate ways. Wanting revenge, DiPaolo hires a slick hitman named Virgil to bring back the men responsible for the robbery, especially Plank. After a run in with a scheming elderly couple and a two very caring homosexuals, Plank finally arrives at the meeting spot where he is ceremoniously double crossed by Henry and Robby, the surviving members of the gang. Only wanting his fair share of the money, Plank follows Henry and Robby to Robby’s family farm.
   
  Strong storyline, great acting, and interesting dialog are only a few reasons why Bottom Feeders was nominated for best picture and won best writer (Tom Baumann) at the B-Movie Awards in New York. Although Plank is a bad guy, he is very likable when held against the rest his robbing peers and you can’t help but feel sorry for the guy. There is a lot more going on in this movie than what I wrote above, but I really think this is a great movie and I don’t want to give too much away. Not only does the dialog beautifully depict the lack of trust between the characters, it is hilarious and witty! There are two scenes in this movie I won’t soon forget. The first being when the thieves recite the plan for the robbery in a nursery rhyme like manner while the camera circles around the men pulling you in like a whirlpool. The second is when the Duncan clan (Robby’s family) sits around the table eating dinner while discussing how to kill, the black hitman Virgil. From Grandpa to child, they all chip in with different lynching ideas. You thought the wackoes from Deliverance were scary, wait till you lay your eyes on the Duncans. Bottom Feeders is one of those independently made gems that deserve a ton of attention. Read the interview with writer director Tom Baumann in Askew Reviews 5 - Denis Sheehan

CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST- 1979. Horror. Italian import. 96 min. Rated X. Nudity, sex, extreme gore, extreme violence. Directed by Ruggero Deodato. A group of young reporters take an expedition into the Amazon Rainforest to shoot a documentary on a group of cannibals. The group disappears without a trace. Two months later a team of rescuers, led by Prof. Monroe, are sent to find out what happened to the crew. While visiting a village, the rescuers find the remains of the reporters and some of their film. Monroe sits down with television executives, who wish to air the film, and watch the found recordings. What they see is truly horrifying. Who are the true savages?
    Yowza! This is perhaps the sickest movie I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen some sick ones! The movie does start rather slowly, but gets really fun when the reporter’s film is viewed. It’s like a film within a film. We see a chick on a stick, a woman gets raped with a rock, an abortion (the fetus is then buried in the mud), a man gets his penis hacked off and eaten. Oh, it never ends. There are also scenes of animals getting mutilated that would piss off any PETA member. Cannibal Holocaust is remarkably realistic and will make you gag. This is the uncut, uncensored version which includes an interview with Ruggero Deodato and a still of a scene that was supposedly never filmed. Truly disturbing, yet great barfbag movie!- Denis Sheehan

THE DEVIL RIDES OUT-(Anchor Bay)1968.Horror. NR. 95 min. Christopher Lee. Two men are concerned when their buddy fails to show up at an annual reunion. Upon further investigation, the men learn that their buddy has taken up with a devil-worshipping cult. They now must save their pal, AND all of mankind.
   
 Released by England’s Hammer Horror, this movie was adapted from Dennis Wheatley’s novel. Although the movie moves at a slow pace, it is a pretty good devil worshipping flic. Creepy shot of Satan himself will give the willies. You’ll recognize the evil dude (Charles Gray) from The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Includes theatrical trailers. Released in America as “The Devil’s Bride” because 20th Century Fox thought U.S. audiences would be fooled by the original title and think it was a western. Duh.  

THE DIRTY GIRLS- (First Run Features) 1964. Arthouse erotica. 82 min. B/W. NR. Directed by Randy Metzger. Follow along with two call girls for a night of sexual adventure. In Paris, the sexy Garance has a full plate of business to attend to. First, she hooks up with a young student who is a virgin. Second, she has to deal with a sadistic hotheaded greaseball. Thirdly, she entertains an old man by dressing up in uniforms. At the same time in Munich, we have the lovely Monique. Tonight, she only wishes to meet with the ever-mysterious Laurence. However, first she must entertain an American businessman, and a lonely movie star. Not only does Monique make the movie star’s night, but also all of those who watch!
    Pretty risqué stuff for 1964. Lots of “odd” sexual behavior is exposed in The Dirty Girls. I don’t think too many movies were made in 1964 depicting a woman getting whacked in the butt with a belt. Voyeurism, masturbation, lesbianism, and others are all here. This is not hardcore at all. In fact, you will see more skin on tv. However, you will love this classic art house sleaze flic. The tape includes bonus scenes which were cut from the movie. These scenes are mostly boob shots of the stars, plus a few scenes way too radical for the early 60s. Great use of the black and white film. Very interesting look at early art house material.- Denis Sheehan
 

THE DISENCHANTED-(First Run Features) Drama. 1990. 78 min. NR. French with English subtitles. Judith Godreche. While in bed with her boyfriend, 17 year old Beth (Godreche) accepts his challenge of her trying to sleep with the ugliest man possible. First, Beth meats an ugly high school boy. She then meets a seemingly intelligent middle aged man, who looks like he has body odor. Thirdly, she must face her sickly mother’s ex-lover and caregiver. How will this perplexed young woman handle this challenge?
   
Not a bad movie. Although I think it runs emotionally deeper than I can ever possibly comprehend. Judith Godreche does a good job portraying the complex Beth. There was too many reference made towards poetry for my taste (I hate poetry). I will say though, I was glued to the tv watching this one.- Denis Sheehan

DON’T MESS WITH MY SISTER- Drama. 1985. 85 min. Rated NR. Violence, brief nudity. Written and directed by Meir Zarchi. A young married man, unhappy with his life, spends the night with an exotic belly dancer his wife hired for his birthday party. When the wife finds out, she tells her two brothers to kick the snot out of him.
    Ug! Ultra lame movie. The only reason why I reviewed was; 1) it was written and directed by Meir Zarchi who also wrote and directed “I Spit On Your Grave.” 2) I must admit, that is one cool title!- Denis Sheehan

ENCOUNTER OF THE SPOOKY KIND-(Tai Seng) Horror/martial arts. 90 min. NR. Chinese w/English subtitles.  Cheung (Sammo Hung) is your typical happy go lucky married guy who just happens to have an unfaithful wife. Not only is Master Tam Cheung’s boss, but he is also the one porking his wife. Once Cheung discovers that his wife is misbehaving, Mater Tam employs a black magic priest to dispose of Cheung. When the righteous brother of the black magic priest learns that Cheung is in trouble, he takes it upon himself to teach Cheung how to defends himself against the evil spirits that will try to kill him. While Cheung wards off the spirits, the two brothers fight each other to the dreadful end. The movie ends with Cheung facing and his slut wife.

THE EROTIC WITCH PROJECT- (Seduction Cinema) Erotic parody. 90 min. NR, nudity, lesbian sexual situations. Katie, Darian, and Victoria enter the woods of Bucchsville, New Jersey to look for the legendary Erotic Witch. They are never seen again and the only evidence of their adventure is this home video the three women shot. The video depicts how the three innocent women are overcome by an unseen presence and transformed into masturbating, sexual dynamos who’ll stop at nothing for a little girl on girl action in the woods.
   
Ok, I think we all know what movie this one parodies. Erotic Witch basically follows the same story as Blair Witch, but instead of the getting scared, the girls are continuously horny. Instead of leaving rock piles and sticks outside of the girl’s tent, the Erotic Witch leaves nudie mags and dildos! The beginning of the movie even includes interviews with local townsfolk discussing the legend of the Erotic Witch. Trust me when I say that these interviews will crack you up! They are hilarious, especially the ear-flapped cap wearing wacko. This flic is a soft-core eroticism with tons of nudity, but no hard-core action. There are also no men present (yeah!). The production is actually pretty damn good and the acting, believe it or not, is just as good. The movie stars Katie Keane (babe), Darian Caine, Victoria Vega, and is directed by John Bucchus. There is also a special collector's edition DVD which includes Inside the Erotic Witch (a 50 minute behind the scenes documentary), photo gallery, web links, and trailers for other Seduction Cinema releases. You just know I’ll be watching this baby again. – Denis Sheehan

THE FILTH AND THE FURY: A SEX PISTOLS FILM (Site) Documentary. 110 minutes. Rated R, language, brief nudity. The first 15 minutes or so of this film gives us a look at the state of social unrest in London during the mid 1970s. Unemployment is high, the trash is piling up in the streets, taxes are high, and people hate eachother and their government. Amongst all this angst, a small sex shop located in the heart of the city is thriving as misfit teenagers use the place as a hangout. The stores owner, Malcolm McLaren, pulls together four young chaps and manages them as a band. These four chaps are Paul Cook, Steve Jones, Glen Matlock, and Johnny Rotten and they become the infamous Sex Pistols. This documentary takes us on the journey of The Sex Pistols short lived romp with world fame.
      This flic is a pretty good in depth look at the conception, short life, and death of the Sex Pistols. There is a ton of old interviews with the band members, including the infamous “dirty word” interview shown live on London tv with Siouxie Sioux in the background. There is also a heavy dosage of live concert footage shown of the band through out their term, although prerecorded music is often edited over the live sound. Surviving Pistols are also interviewed to give their point of view as to what exactly was going through their minds at the time of their punk rock dominance. These interviews have the men sitting in shadows and not revealing what they look like now-a-days. I’m guessing this was done so the viewer can relate to the Pistols as they were in their hay day, and not as “old” men. As you might expect, this doc eventually turns into the Sid Vicious story as the director makes an extra effort to show us the self-destruction of poor ol’ Sid. By the way, you cannot tell me that Courtney Love isn’t trying to be Nancy Spungen. I have seen a lot of Sex Pistols junk in my time and this doc did show me stuff I’ve never seen before. However, the director rehashed a majority of his 1980 Sex Pistols bio “The Great Rock-n-Roll Swindle” into this bio. He obviously found some new lost footage and edited it in around the stuff he already used 20 years ago. The doc does move at a pretty good clip, but there are a lot of needless shots of Shakespeare plays and other useless fodder thrown in that kind of annoyed me. If you like the Sex Pistols, you will dig this insightful flic. But, try to see “The Great Rock-n-Roll Swindle" first. Although not as compelling, it’s a tad more fun. – Denis Sheehan

GHOST DOG: THE WAY OF THE SAMURAI- (Artisan) (Ghost Dog Site) Crime/Drama. Approx. 115 minutes. Rated R, violence.  Ghost Dog (Forest Whitaker) is a hitman for the mob who lives his life and performs his work by the precepts of the 18th century warrior text, Hagakure: The Way of the Samurai. After years of competent contract killings, Louie (John Tormey), the legman for a struggling mafia family headed by Ray Vargo (Henry Silva), hires Ghost Dog to “off” Handsome Frank. Although Frank is a made man, he is also banging Vargo’s cute, young daughter Louise (Tricia Vessey) and must be put to sleep for his horny behavior. After receiving his orders via carrier pigeon, Ghost Dogs’ preferred way to communicate, the contract is successfully pulled off. However, Louise was present at the murder and now Ray is pissed off and orders Ghost Dog killed. After returning home to find his pigeon coop destroyed and many of the birds dead, GD sets out to take care of those responsible. After being tipped of by Louie, who GD considers to be his master, of Vargo’s intentions, Ghost Dog sets his sights on clan of Italian meatheads. Feeling disrespected, Louie in turn sets his sights on GD and the two must face each other.  Can Ghost Dog continue with his adherence to Hagkure philosophy, which calls for one to show the utmost respect to one’s master?
   Along with Whitaker’s sublime, zen like performance and the pacing of the film, I honestly thought that I too was living my life according to the Hagakure text. The philosophy of the ancient book is revealed throughout the movie by Whitaker’s narration of selected passages from the book. Whitaker doesn’t have much to say, but when he does speak, it directly pertains to what is going on and sparks thought. Adding to the character of the film are Raymond and Pearline, two of GD’s friends. Raymond is a jovial French speaking ice cream man and Pearline is a young black girl who likes to read books. Although Raymond only speaks French, and GD only speaks English, the two men are able to carry on a conversation without understanding each other. Pearline and GD only meet a few times, but they enjoy each other’s company due to their shared interest in books. Scripted as the film’s bad guys, the Italian mafia guys are actually a touch of comic relief. Henry Silva’s character is your straightforward mob head, but his two right hand men are rather goofy. One guy is an old fart who likes yelling out the obvious, and the other is a middle aged man who likes rap music. This rap fan even performs a little of his own rapping for us to enjoy. During one such performance, he appears to apply hemorrhoid cream to his ass as he raps along to the stereo. As much as I enjoyed this flic, one thing did annoy me. There are a few times when GD drives around in a car listening to hip hop/rap tunes. These scenes are a little too long and I found them drawn out. The ending of Ghost Dog suggests that perhaps there could be a sequel. I will tell you right now, that will be cool! Wu Tang Clan founder THE RZA composes the film’s atmospheric music. Written and directed by Jim Jarmusch. Cool movie, you should check it out!- Denis Sheehan

GIRLS GONE WILD 1, 2, 3 -(www.girlsgonewild.com) NR, tons of nudity. Each tape is approx. 45 min and sold separately. Most of the exhibitionism on these three tapes are from women attending Mardi Gras and spring break. Watch as the girl next door drunkenly shows off her most personal of body areas. The flashing never ceases! Big, small, firm, floppy, beautiful, and the down right icky boobs are exhibited for your viewing pleasure. Plenty of butt and crotch shots will keep your tongue on the floor. It is amazing what a little, or a lot, of beer do to some people. Thank god!
     Hey, what can I say about these three tapes? If you like women, then you must own all three Girls Gone Wild. Simple. The first tape also comes in a “deluxe” edition, which includes an extra 20 minutes of VERY risqué stuff. The women not only show you stuff, they basically let you in to take a look around. To make things better, I saw a girl I know on tape two!!–Denis Sheehan

GOODBYE CHARLIE (EI Cinema) Crime drama/thriller. 85 minutes. NR, violence. It’s Friday night and four friends sit in a bar, drinking beer, and discussing the finer topics in life. After arguing about whether or not Woody Woodpecker is gay, a fifth pal, Jack, enters the bar and joins the rest of the gang. Knowing that Jack had a hot date the night before, the four men grill him for details. Jack calmly tells the men how the woman was all over him from the dance floor, to the men’s room, to the elevator, and finally to the couch in his apartment. With the men laughing, Jack continues to describe how the woman suddenly pushed him away and wanted to leave. Jack then describes, in a very subdued way, how he then beat the woman to death with a golf club. Not believing Jack, the men go to his apartment where they all see the beaten remains of the dead woman in the bathtub. Sickened beyond belief, and scared, the men offer to help Jack get out of this mess. Not knowing how to dispose of the body, Jack calls Ray, a crazy hitman, for help. Ray, who was once represented by Jack in a court of law, shows up and starts working his wonders to help rid Jack and pals of the body. However, Jack has other plans up his sleeve further proving that most lawyers are scum.
    Good movie. I liked this movie enough to deal with the non-tracking piece of junk screener I watched it on. I loved the way the story was shot and written. We realize what the problem is right off, but the history of the characters and the incident is explained in different segments throughout the flic. Although there are a few draggy parts, there are some very shocking scenes that more than make up for it. All I’ll say is “Ouch, my hand!” The acting is very good, but the actor who plays Ray did tend to overact and try too much to be like Al Pacino as Tony Montana in Scareface. I loved the camera work during opening bar scene showing the four pals sitting around drinking and talking about nothing. Again, good movie. – Denis Sheehan

ICE FROM THE SUN- (b-movie.com) (Wicked Pixel)  Horror. 116 minutes. NR, violence, gore, nudity. While in the process of dying from an attempted suicide, Alison is beckoned by the angles of heaven and hell to deal with a force that they cannot even confront. The Presence, the evil overlord of his own sick little world, pulls the innocent into his world of chaos and bloodshed. After pulling in a group of young adults to torture, Alison is inserted into the bizarre world to hunt down The Presence and kill him. While hunting him down, The Presence kills each person one by one, with each death more horrible than the last. Feeling confused, lost, and reluctant, Alison finally comes face to face with The Presence and we finally find out the truth behind this evil bastard, and why Alison was tabbed to kill him.
    First off, this is a cool story idea. Just the fact of this entire “fake” world and all the evilness within is very cool and grabbed my attention right away. Aside from the lead female, the acting is very good. The killings are gory, imaginative, and pretty damn impressive. You will enjoy the head exploding scene leaving the poor soul’s lower jaw and teeth intact- very icky. The music, hardcore industrial, fits perfectly. As much as I like this flic, there are a few negatives (there always is). The flic could have been about 25 minutes shorter with some editing. There are a few dull spots that could have been hacked. There is also a slight problem with the sound, which is common with independent movies. The voices of the “real” characters are kind of low so I had to turn the ol’ volume up. However, the voices of the angels and The Presence are fine, but they appeared too loud because the volume was up. Not really a big deal, but I had to chime. The make up effects are very cool and the cinematography is right on. Written and directed by Eric Stanze , who has made a number of indie flics. One of the best horror b-movies I’ve seen. This movie is also available on DVD, which is loaded with extras. I highly recommend you check it out. I will post my review of On Thin Ice, a documentary on the making of Ice From The Sun, soon.. -Denis Sheehan

INBRED REDNECKS- (www.b-movie.com) (www.inbredrednecks.com) Comedy. Approx. 135 min. NR.  Billy Bob, Bubba, Joe Bob, and Clovis are your not so ordinary 20 something pals residing in North Carolina. Not only do they enjoy drinking beer, brawling, picking up hot chicks, and engaging in intelligent conversation, but they are rednecks. Somehow (which is answered later in the movie), Billy Bob has raised a giant size Rooster, named BigAss Rooster, and the boys hope to find fortune and fame by entering the rooster in high paying cockfights. While the rest of the boys hang out at the fair and cockfights, Clovis is busy courting the “hot chick that works at the new burger joint.” Well, Clovis gets his date and soon discovers, hilariously I might add, that Weinerschnitzel doesn’t agree with him. After a few impressive wins, a rival cock fighter steals BigAss, and the boys must find out who has committed this dastardly deed and get their cock back.
   
This is probably the funniest movie I have seen all year. The best way to describe this movie, is to call it the “Clerks” of the stereotypical redneck south. The dialog is absolutely hilarious because it perfectly depicts just how you would think rednecks actually talk and think. The topic of discussion usually centers on beer, girls, blowjobs, cock fighting, and Bill Clinton’s scrotum. What really makes this flic fun is that there’s a ton of weird things going on through out the movie. A character, Sweetmeat the Midget for one, will show up and add something totally hilarious to the story, then disappear. Not only is this low budget gem nicely shot, but the acting is good, and the sound is right on. There are a few hairy edits, but that’s ok. Inbred Rednecks was written and directed by N. Carolina native Joshua Warren, who also stars as Clovis. Warren ingeniously exploits, and has fun with, all the stereotypes of what you might have concerning rednecks. Looking for some politically incorrect, laugh out loud fun? Just look at Inbred Rednecks.  –Denis Sheehan

THE KILLER TONGUE- (Apix) 1996. Sci-Fi/Black comedy. 98 min. Rated R, for a bunch of junk. After double-crossing their partners in a bank robbery, Candy hides out in a convent and Johnny turns himself in to do time getting the law of his back. After spending a year in a desert work prison run by a sadistic warden, Johnny gets word that he will be released and sends a letter to Candy announcing the great news. Happily, Candy and her four dogs leave the convent and waits for Johnny at the secret meeting house. While Candy and the mutts are eating dinner, a meteorite slams into the desert scattering pieces all over the place and depositing a small piece in Candy’s bowl of mush. When Candy takes a spoonful, she is blown across the room and knocked unconscious. While she is out cold, the pouches dig in and chow down the rest of Candy’s mush. When Candy awakens, she finds that she has been transformed into a sexy leather clad hottie and that her four dogs are now human transvestites who only wish to serve and care for her! You think that’s weird? How do you think Candy feels when she realizes that her tongue has multiplied in length and likes to kill people? Candy tries everything to stop the tongue, even suicide, but the tongue always wins. While Candy battles her tongue, Johnny is busy trying to free himself from the prison as Chief (Robert Englund), the sadistic warden, tries his best to keep Johnny incarcerated. Really needing Johnny’s help, Candy sends three of her transvestites to fetch Johnny and bring him home. The result are, a jail break, Johnny hooks up with a sexy nun, the two double crossed buffoons show up looking for revenge, and just about everybody battles THE KILLER TONGUE!
    Ok, this movie is absolutely insane! Just when I thought it couldn’t get any crazier, it doubled in looniness! The tongue effects are great and I must give Melinda Clarke (Return of The Living Dead III) a ton of credit for her great facial expressions as she battles the huge tongue hanging out of her mouth. To be honest, it took a few minutes to sink in when it came to the pooches turning into transvestites, but I figured it out using that ol’ melon of mine. Robert Englund does a great, and out of character, job portraying the scumbag warden and Doug ('Pinhead') Bradley also has a part. Although everything about this movie is hilarious, the most hilarious thing about it is when the killer tongue TALKS! The voice is perfect! Kind of sounds like the bartender Moe on The Simpsons. This tongue in cheek (get it?) movie is a cross between The Evil Dead and The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Very odd and entertaining flic!- Denis Sheehan  

THE LAST BROADCAST- Horror/mystery. 86 min. NR. Hoping to boost ratings for their failing cable access tv show, Steve and Locus plan on shooting a live broadcast/webcast of their search for the legendary Jersey Devil from the Pine Barrens of New Jersey (woods). Needing help, the men employ a psychic named Jim in the hopes he will lead them to the whereabouts of the Devil. They also employ Rein, a sound guy who has a knack of recording super-natural sounds. The men head off into the woods and quickly become irritated with Jim because of his asshole attitude. The next day, Jim emerges from the woods claiming he cannot find the other three men. When the police investigate, they find the mutilated bodies of Locus and Rein, Steve’s blood soaked hat, and the footage the men shot. Using the found footage, Jim is found guilty of murder and thrown in jail where he dies not long after. A few days after Jim’s death, a filmmaker is mailed even more, mostly destroyed, lost footage from the ill-fated last broadcast. As the filmmaker makes his documentary, he hires a female audio/visual expert to piece together the film to see what’s on it. As the woman’s work progresses, a face appears on the film, a face that does not belong to any of the four cable men. 
   
Yes, this is the movie some people feel THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT ripped off. Broadcast came out about a year before Blair Witch and is presented as a true-life documentary. In my opinion, there is enough difference between the two films to clear BLAIR WITCH of plagiarism. After all, “found footage” movies are nothing new (1979’s Cannibal Holocaust for example). Broadcast investigates the disappearance and murder of the three men and mainly focuses on the belief that Jim is innocent of all charges. There are interviews with police, other cable workers, etc. Of the 86 minutes of the film, only about 35 minutes of “found footage” is shown. The story is kind of intriguing and the mystery is revealed at the end of the film. The acting is nothing special, but the people here are not supposed to be actors. If this movie were to be shown as one of those investigative reports tv shows, minus the ending, it would come across as a true and believable story. I really liked this movie and I’m glad it is receiving some notoriety. Check it out. – Denis Sheehan   

THE NECRO FILES- (Astaroth Entertainment) Horror. Approx 70 min. NR, extreme violence, gore, nudity, rape. Two tough guy cops, Sloane and Manners, kill a deranged rapist murderer named Logan minutes after disemboweling a woman. Months later, a satanic cult sacrifices a baby over the rapist’s grave hoping to resurrect him. Sure enough, the rapist zombie pops from the ground and immediately picks up where he left off. He kills some of the cult members and begins roaming the city raping and murdering helpless women. After investigating the new rash of murders, Sloane and Manners are back on the trial and will do anything to kill Logan again. Also wanting Logan dead again are the only two surviving members of the satanic cult who resurrected the zombie in the first place. In a last desperate effort, the two men resurrect the sacrificed baby to destroy Logan once and for all. 
      Damn, The Necro Files is by far the nuttiest and most bizarre movie ever! First off, the zombie roams around with his three-foot schlong hanging out of his pants. The resurrected baby is actually a doll painted white being flown around on a string. The acting is so atrocious it hurts. The make up effects includes a few disembowelments, one dick getting ripped off, a woman’s nipple getting sliced off with a knife and eaten, and a few more pleasantries. Let’s not forget about the nudity and the blow up doll! I heard that this movie was first suppose to be a hard core-gore flic, but I wasn’t able to confirm. There are no hard core sex scenes, but the extreme violence and rape theme are enough to condemn this beauty. Completely outrageous in so many ways, that’s why I loved it!- Denis Sheehan

PROJECT GRIZZLY-(First Run Features) Documentary. 72 min. NR. After surviving an attack by a grizzly bear as a child, Canadian researcher Troy Hurtubise has devoted his life to “close-quarters bear research” and the development of a grizzly proof suit. The documentary allows us to watch the development of the suit and experience Troy’s obsession with grizzly bears. Watch Troy test the suit’s strength by putting it through a number of tests, which includes Troy getting hit by a pickup truck and getting smashed with huge logs! Will the suit withstand a close encounter with the ferocious grizzly?
   
Talk about one odd documentary! This baby takes the cake. This dude Troy is out of his mind. Very interesting story. The only downfall with this video is that Troy constantly talks about man’s spiritual connection to nature. I don’t get into that stuff. However, a man’s spiritual connection to his tv is something to discuss!- Denis Sheehan

THE LOSERS- (Video Dungeon)1970. Aka ‘Nam’s Angels. Approx 90 min. NR, violence. Seems as though a CIA bigwig has been captured by the Viet Cong during the Vietnam War. Well, have no fear because Link (William Smith) is here. The CIA hires Link and his group of renegade biker buddies to break through enemy lines and rescue the captured agent. The boys arrive in a small village and prepare their bikes for battle. This entails welding huge guns onto the bikes and making sure that hand grenades are easily accessible. The boys also manage to get drunk and pick up women every night while planning their attack. Finally, the time comes for the attack. The men, minus one who took off, jump on their bikes and speed into the enemy camp with a reckless abandon.
   
Great biker and war flic starring the king of b-movies, William Smith. You will never see a movie like this one. It is pure fun. Guns, beer, woman, violence, and fights. What more could you ask? Bernie Hamilton, the black captain from Starsky and Hutch, also stars. This is the movie that Bruce Willis and his girlfriend are watching in their motel room in Pulp Fiction. Link’s speech about being suppressed by “the man” is hilarious. The Losers is a must for all biker movie fans.- Denis Sheehan

THE RAPE AFTER- (Video Dungeon) Horror. 1986. Approx 90 min. Cantonese with English subtitles. NR. Violence, mild gore. A photographer (sorry, I forget his name) steals an ancient statue from a temple while on a shoot. Later that night, after he and a model get hammered and pass out, the statue comes to life and rapes the beautiful model. While attempting to get the unborn baby aborted, the demon suddenly appears to save his child and destroys the abortion clinic. Some time later, while being driven home by the photographer, the model is killed in an automobile accident and swears to get even with the photographer right before she is toasted alive in the burning car. Sure enough, the demon child busts out of his dead mother’s body, squishes a doctor’s head, and begins his crusade to kill the photographer and all those close to him. The photographer doesn’t go quietly though, he finds a gang of munks who will help him defeat this evil demon 
   
This is one weird and spooky flic. The story is very odd, but very cool. There is a lot of weird stuff here. Demons, flesh eating zombies, frogs being pulled out of some guy’s head, and a lot of up close puking shots! Although there is a lot of gore, it really isn’t too impressive. The point is made though. The soundtrack is actually spooky as hell too. The subtitles were at times off the screen, and are a lot of translation errors too. This is a good one if you are looking for an off the wall Asian flic.- Denis Sheehan

SOMETHING IN THE WATER: A BOSTON VIDEO COMPILATION (TTPS) NR. Approx. 35 min. DIY video compilation of a live songs by Boston area punk bands. Included are The Medveds, Greed Seed, Kermit’s Finger, Bastard Squad, Zippo Raid, And Penis Fly Trap. Each band plays two songs, except for The Medveds who play three. There is also a short skit to start the video off “starring” Ron Lacer of Fan Attic Records. The Medveds "BC Headache Powder" rules as far as I'm concerned and the bastard Squad's version of Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It" is hilarious. The video is shot with one hand held video camera in area clubs/bars, and in some dude's cellar. The lighting is sometimes bad and the sound is pretty good. I loved this video because I love these kinds of DIY projects. Besides, all the bands are pretty damn cool too!- Denis Sheehan

THE SPOOK WHO SAT BY THE DOOR- Drama. 1973 102 minutes. PG. Violence. The CIA hires Dan Freeman as a token black man to help government relations among the minority races in the U.S.  After five years of training and toiling in the basement of the CIA, Freeman quits and returns home to a Chicago ghetto. Pissed at “whitey,” Freeman uses his knowledge and teaches it to fellow black men in the hopes of over throwing white America. In the matter of months, Freeman amasses a network of black freedom fighters across the country and prepares for a new American Revolution.
    This can’t be called a blaxploitation flic because it goes beyond that. This is a story of a black man who is fed up with a racist white America and decides to violently lash out. I have read that United Artists pulled this flic out of the theaters because it pissed so many people off. The story was bogged down a bit by a love story, but one must take the good with the bad. Great acting job by Lawrence Cook (Freemon). Based on the novel of the same name by Sam Greenlee and directed by Ivan Dixon. – Denis Sheehan

SQUEEZE - (Miramax) 1997. Drama. Rated R, violence. Dramatic story of three young teenage boys growing up in Boston. The three teens are torn between the safety of a local youth center and the alluring call of money from dealing drugs. After choosing the wrong direction and falling deeper into a life of crime, and fearing for their lives from rival drug dealers, the teens realize they must seek help from the leader of the youth center.
   
SQUEEZE beautifully depicts how innocent teenagers can be sucked into a life of crime and finding out they get more than they can handle. Starring a bunch of “no names,” the performances are great and truly believable. The movie is well written and nicely shot. Film in and around Boston. This flic was released in 1997 and this review first appeared in ASKEW REVIEWS 1. I decided to bring it back because the writer/director, Robert Patton- Spruill, is opening a film production house in Roxbury, Ma called FILM SHACK. The production house will be a one-stop film production source, including equipment rental, for all types of filmmakers. FILM SHACK is due to open Next month (January 2000). After selling SQUEEZE to Miramax for $1 million, Robert stayed in Boston and has decided to make a difference in his hometown while helping out area filmmakers. This guy deserves a ton of credit. – Denis Sheehan

TRACES OF DEATH- (Brain Damage Films)  Shockumentary. 87 min. NR. Extremely gross! Watch R. Budd Dwyer blow his head off with a gun at a press conference. They show it a few times in slow motion so you can see every sick microsecond of his head being blown apart. Witness a man shoot his ex-wife in the head while a news crew is interviewing her. Laugh at a moronic tourist who stupidly gets out of his car that is surrounded by lions. Yes, he gets chowed upon. Ever wonder what a sex change (male to female) operation looks like? Ick! Plenty of racing accidents, operations footage, embalmings, and even a few executions! There are also tons of stills of people who’s bodies are just torn apart for different reasons.- Denis Sheehan

 TRACES OF DEATH 2- (Brain Damage Films)  Shockumentary. 90 min. NR. Extremely gross! More first hand accounts of mayhem, murder, death, and all that stuff. Lots of motorcycle/car stunts going horribly wrong. Watch some poor souls leap to their death from burning buildings (one case has a guy jumping and landing about 20 feet in front of the cameraman). Watch another sex change operation, this time female to male! Witness a man get both arm tied to trucks and driven in different direction. Which arm gives first? Riots, fist fights, and plenty o’ executions too! All sorts of tragedy is displayed while death rock/speed metal can be heard. Yes, there is a soundtrack to this shockumantary.- Denis Sheehan

 TRACES OF DEATH 3- (Brain Damage Films)  Shockumentary. 90 min. NR. Extremely gross! Yes, even more nasty ass stuff to make your stomach churn. The major emphasis of this tape is the aftermath of bombings. People are just blown to bits all over the place. You will not believe this one dude who has just been torn in half by a bomb…and he is still alive!! I must make a confession; I did have to fast forward by a large segment of this tape. Men will understand why. We get the pleasure of viewing a tribal ritual where groups of young boys get circumcised.  The poor boys are held down, have a piece of twin tied to the tip of their penis, the foreskin is then stretched to a sickening length, and CHOP, the skin is diced off with a knife. We also get to see a female circumcision, which is just as disturbing. The handy works of death squads from around the world are also covered. Lots of other gag inducing material as well. TOD 3 also has a death metal soundtrack.- Denis Sheehan

 TRACES OF DEATH 4- (Brain Damage Films)  Shockumentary. 90 min. NR. Extremely gross! More footage to make you wince and toss your dinner all over the floor for your dog to eat up. Ever see a giant moose stomp an old man to death? Well now you can. You won’t believe your eyes when you see all the birth defects that are covered. Take a look at some huge tumors and even a poor guy who has elephantiasis of the scrotum. Tons of third world executions and punishment. Amazing. Lots of car crash victims too. There is also about fifteen minutes of body piercing and a look at some wackos who have the sex organs totally covered with hardware. Truly unreal.- Denis Sheehan

ZERO WOMAN- (Tokyo Shock ) Femme fatale/action. NR, nudity, sex, violence. Japanese with English subtitles. Special agent Rei (Natsuki Ozawa) is a member of Japan’s most skilled covert police force known as Section Zero. Rei is strong, deadly, can fight like a champion, and most importantly-horny!! Agent Rei is ordered to retrieve some stolen stock certificates worth millions and she plans on carrying out that mission even if it kills her. Just as Rei gets close to the certificates, another trio beats her to the punch and steal the certificates from the owner. They even hack off his arm to get them. While investigating the trio, Rei is drugged, raped, shot and lives through a painful looking operation removing a bullet. Don’t worry, Rei severely injures the rapist with a-uhg-meathook. Rei then learns that the trio is actually working for another individual who plans on selling the certificates to an area crime boss.  As you can imagine, the back stabbing starts as greed takes over and gallons of blood are spilled. 
    If you like bloody action movies with plenty of violence, nudity, sex, and starring an absolutely beautiful Japanese woman, then this one is for you. Plain and simple. The subtitles are easy to read.  Even the video box is great. (pix taken from the web site)- Denis Sheehan

 

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