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and the 

by Amy Bugbee  

            Okay, you don't know me, and may not care to, but I still feel compelled to share this discovery with all of you. One of the things I do besides write articles for fine publications like this one, is make and sell t-shirts – I make the designs, I mean, the screen prints.  Of course, T-shirts don't just grow on trees, so it is my job to order them. The company I buy my tees from is a huge nationwide, quality wholesale company. I have no problems with this company, nothing but praise for them, really.
The problem I have is with society, yes society, imagine that? We are such a ridiculously politically correct nation in some aspects it's absurd, and yet in other ways we are archaic. I mean, who really says African-American, or Native American, or Latino American? Besides being a mouthful, these are garbage terms designed solely to further separate the people of this melting pot called America from one another. Me personally, I have lived with, worked with, and befriended many a black, hispanic, and every other color of the rainbow, and the only people who ever use the terms African-American and so on, are morons from places like Cape Cod and Maine where there are no Blacks or Mexicans, and they don't know any Blacks or Mexicans, and if they did come across any, they would be scared to death. You know who you are folks, but that's okay. You've been tricked, and programmed by society. It happens.
What gets me, is while we're walking on eggshells with some kinds of people other people are fair game and fodder for jokes and the like. Sure, sure, what I am saying is nothing new, yes we all know one of those groups are the Springer style, White Trash we all find so amusing, that has been well documented.
Another group that was okay to make fun of, until just recently, was fat people. Remember a few short years ago, when there was nary a fat in all of Hollywood , and actors would gain weight for roles and we'd applaud them - ugh!?!  Suddenly though, this last year fat men became all the rage, partially due to mob boss Tony Soprano, and every network stepped all over each other to get enough fat guys on sitcoms, so the "everyman" could feel comfy in his LAZY BOY sucking on some beers and eating microwave burritos. You've seen them 'The King of Queens' or 'Still Standing' just to name a few whose names I know.
Again, you're asking, "Hey Amy, what the hell does any of this have to do with t-shirts, are you daft?" Well quite possibly I am, but I am getting to that.
Just the other day I was skimming the pages of my wholesale t-shirt catalog for prices on halter-tops and tank tops, thinking that they might be a nice addition for my summer sales, when I made a shocking discovery. Remember the "DEGO TEE"? Remember them stretched across the chests of Rocky and Tony on Taxi?  Well my politically correct friends, it is gone! Really, it's gone! They no longer exist, and I am going to guess it has to do with the fact that we have become now very Italian Sensitive. I am sure we will soon be calling them Italian-Americans in polite circles (okay, I know we already are). The word DEGO has been struck from the American vocabulary faster than ol' Tony Soprano could find a new mistress.
But, more shocking than this, MUCH MORE SHOCKING, is what it has been replaced with. The atrocious "DEGO TEE" has been replaced with the soothing and acceptable term "WIFE BEATER". Yep, there it was, right on the pages of my wholesale t-shirt catalog, a major supplier of cotton to the entire USA -- the very ethnically and racially sensitive USA -- but apparently, the Pro-Spousal Abuse USA !
Oh I am not joking, it was a mere page away from the toddler tees! "The Beater", (I was gonna order some "DEGO TEES", or Men's Tank Tops, as I assumed they might be called, but I opted out on ordering any "BEATERS"). And, it's not just them using this term, I mean wholesale t-shirt catalogs are barely revolutionary, I've seen it on clothing store websites, and heard the reference on cutting edge TV and radio shows, seen and heard by young and old.
"Ho, Ho, Ho, and he was wearing a Beater with jeans.”
"Yeah, I like the way these wife beaters show off my muscles."
How is it the word DEGO is unacceptable, the word NEGRO is a cardinal sin (Have you not yet heard your local newscaster refer to "The N Word"?), and FAT is even becoming a profanity when referring to 300 lbs. MEN, but a WIFE BEATER TEE is funny, clever, and perfectly acceptable as a point of reference?
The company told me, that that's what everyone calls them now because guys who wear them are known to beat their wives.  Hmm... Is the shirt making them do that? If so, perhaps we should stop production all together? And, since this is okay, can we now call toddler tees, ASS RAPE SHIRTS? Toddlers do get raped!  Sad but true, it's a fact we are reminded of regularly in the news. Can we call men's Speedo swimsuits DICK SUCKERS? I mean, homosexuals do like them (No offense Gay Mafia of Hollywood ). Can we call Maternity wear "SLUT KILLER"? Oh wait, that one might be okay, after all it doesn't target Blacks, Italians or Gays, just women. Us wicked, wicked women!
           We deserve to have our faces bashed in, we deserve to have the life choked out of us, we deserve to be beaten by people with more than double our strength!  What's wrong with beating the fuck out of your wife?  She is your property after all -- Just ask OJ!  I guess, what should I expect from a world where drawing a SWASTIKA on a wall will get you 20 years in the slammer, but KILLING your girlfriend might get you 3-5?
Well, I for one, would really like to thank AMERICA for relegating me – as a women, not to the back of the bus, not to the underground tunnels along the Rio Grande, and not to the airplane seatbelt extender line, but to the bottom of the sea, the shallow grave in the woods, the trunk of the beater car, and the waiting room at the emergency room.
Thank you, thank you, you sickening motherfuckers -- and I do mean MOTHER FUCKERS!





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